


Tangled Around You

by ShioriAzuma



Series: Poisonous Cures [2]
Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: M/M, Mildly Dubious Consent, Past Child Abuse, Post-Season/Series 02, Pre-Season/Series 03, Season/Series 02, Unhealthy Relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-30
Updated: 2019-09-30
Packaged: 2020-11-08 14:07:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,424
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20836742
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShioriAzuma/pseuds/ShioriAzuma
Summary: Jonathan's turbulent relationship with Billy has only made him more impulsive and desperate to be near the other boy. He knows he should get away but there's something about him that keeps Jonathan coming back for more, no matter how much it might hurt.Sequel to 'Yes, Sir'





	Tangled Around You

**Author's Note:**

> This is the well overdue sequel to Yes, Sir. Fair warning, I haven't seen season 3 yet!

Billy was a sickness. It was going to kill him sooner or later if the boy didn't do it himself. Billy left his shirt once. Jonathan had clutched it in his hands, wiping at his face, and Billy had snorted at him and left without it. To his embarrassment, he slept with it, the mix of smoke and aftershave flooding his nose. 

His dreams. 

He was an addict getting by on scraps until he could get the real thing again. Some might call him a glutton for punishment and, yeah, they'd probably be right. But he wasn't addicted to Billy, he told himself, just the soothing of the ache inside him when he held Billy's undivided attention. God, he needed it. He had made a desperate attempt to replace Billy with Nancy when he finally got a chance with her but he couldn't do it. He couldn't dirty her like that, foul her with his presence and body. If only he had, maybe she could have saved him, stopped him going back to Billy again and again to be shattered to nothing. Every time Billy walked away a piece of his soul crumbled to dust. He could feel it. 

\--- 

Jonathan walked down the side of the road, camera gripped between his hands as he peered in vain through the trees for something to catch his eye. He hadn't taken a single shot in close to a week. He shivered in spite of the heat and dropped the camera to let it swing from the neck strap. It always felt cold to him these days, drama queen that he was. 

The rumble of a car driving up the road behind him broke Jonathan from his pity party as he shuffled closer to the treeline. Cars always raced so fast down long straight roads like these and Jonathan tended to get caught up in the wind that whipped behind them. If he was lucky and it was a stranger. Guys from school had been known to "pretend" to try and run him down by swerving over the edge of the road. But the engine didn't roar louder although it was definitely closer. He was almost tempted to turn around and look. 

"Oi, Byers!" 

Jonathan whipped around so fast the camera struck his side, his eyes wide as they could go locked onto the car rolling to a stop. 

"Billy," he breathed. His whole body tensed, though whether out of fear or anticipation was up for debate. Should he run? No debate needed to find that answer. 

Billy leaned out of the open window, cigarette dangling between his fingers, hair catching the light. "What you walking down here for?" 

Jonathan gestured to his camera. Looking at the other now, a bit of that itch he normally felt to capture the moment through his lens returned. Why did he have to be hooked on someone so beautiful? Billy only ever acknowledged his existence as a prelude to sex. Were they going to go into the woods? Was that it? 

"Whatever. Get in." 

Jonathan reacted automatically to the command. "Where are we going?" He opened the door and slumped into the seat, taking deep breaths of the scent which lingered a hundred times thicker in the car than the shirt. He really had no self-discipline. 

"It's a surprise. Just sit back, shut up and let me drive." Billy leaned over to crank up the volume of the music and all but stomped the gas pedal, launching them down the road. 

\--- 

It felt like they had been driving for hours. The sun sank lower as they hurtled down miles of tarmac, the landscape blackening around them until all he could see were the occasional lights of other cars and the shadowy outline of Billy's face. So, of course, he turned to watch the other, straining to hear Billy sing along to the songs blaring from the speakers so loud it felt like they were vibrating. 

A morbid and frankly ridiculous thought crept up on him that if they were to die right then, get smashed up by a truck maybe, he would die with a little smile on his face. It was so peaceful just absorbing everything, not having to do anything himself. 

A niggling sense of guilt was prodding at him for not asking to call his mom at any point in the drive, not even thinking about her before he climbed in the car. Would she be worried? Would she even notice? Maybe he didn't care either way. It was stupid but he felt like she betrayed him every time she let Billy into the house or told him where to find Jonathan. Though it wasn't like she had any idea what was going on – how could she? But weren't moms supposed to sense when something was wrong with their child and stop them from making stupid decisions? Just because he wanted it didn't mean he was in denial about putting himself into painful situations, both physically and emotionally. Chances were she wouldn't even notice he was gone. 

The car slowed and Billy took a right, pulling in front of a motel. The neon signs glared through the glass, lighting Billy's face in green and red. 

"We're stopping here before I pass out. Come on, Byers." 

Jonathan dutifully followed Billy across the gravel parking lot and into the dimly lit reception. It looked like every other motel he'd seen. Worn wooden desk, peeling wallpaper, a lingering smell he couldn't put his finger on what it was and someone sat behind the desk who looked they had lost the will to live a very long time ago. This one was a middle-aged man who looked just as faded as the building when he peered up at us from his book. 

"Yes?" He sighed, put out at having to tear himself away from what looked suspiciously like one of those Harlequin romances his mom often left lying around. 

Billy stepped forward with that confident ease and pulled out his wallet, pulling out a handful of bills. "We'll need a room for the next three nights." 

Three? 

The man huffed again and dragged a yellowing ledger towards him with not much written on the open page. "Double or twin?" 

"Definitely double and make sure to put us away from any other guests." 

Jonathan flushed at the implication of Billy's words. How could he just talk like that to a complete stranger? 

The man gave no reaction beyond scribbling on the paper before shoving the book towards Billy. "Sign here," he ordered and turned to unhook a set of keys from the almost full wall behind him. "Second floor at the end." He dropped the keys into Billy's open palm and returned to his book. 

Billy marched out of the dingy reception towards the outside staircase for the next floor up and Jonathan nearly stumbled to keep up with the long strides. He was trying not to let panic set in as they climbed the rusted stairs on to the exposed walkway. Why had he allowed himself to be brought here with no way of escaping? And what if Billy abandoned him when he was done as he always did? But then he had bought the room for three nights. 

They stopped at the end of the walkway in front of a scuffed up door with the number '28' in rusted digits nailed crookedly into the wood. Billy turned the key in the lock and pushed the door open, switching on the light as he walked in. Jonathan paused in the doorway and peered inside. 

Like the reception, the wallpaper, which may have once been a pale blue, was peeling off at the corners and the carpet looked worn thin. The cracked headboard of the bed stood flush to the left wall and a dresser with a tiny television stood to the right. Billy had disappeared through the door in front of him into what had to be the bathroom. It was nice enough but Jonathan still felt tense. 

He forced himself to walk inside and shut the door behind him. The only light source came from the dull glow of the dusty floor lamp positioned by the door although a chink of brightness escaped underneath the closed bathroom door. There wasn't even a window. Jonathan's skin itched, his muscles tense and ready to run. He felt trapped, caged in, which was stupid given that he was stood right in front of the unlocked door and Billy wasn't even in the room to catch him. He could leave. He _should_ leave. 

"Billy," he called out, more than a little desperate. 

"In a minute!" 

Jonathan's trembling fingers gripped his camera and pulled the strap over his head to place it inside one of the dresser drawers. He needed to be distracted before his nerves got the better of him, before it sunk in just how much of a dumb idea it was to get into that car no matter how badly he wanted to be touched. He needed hands on him right now to keep him in place, keep him grounded, before he ran out into the night with no clue where to go. 

"Billy, please," he tried again. 

The bathroom door banged open as Billy stormed towards him. "My God, _what_, Byers? What's your problem?" 

His cheeks burned and he looked down, a little embarrassed yet undeniably less tense. Or tense in a different, better way. 

"I don't want to be alone." 

Billy rolled his eyes. "I was barely in there five minutes." But still he continued forward until he had Jonathan pushed against the wall, the tips of their noses brushing they were so close. "Tell me you missed me," Billy whispered, tongue snaking out to slide along Jonathan's bottom lip. 

Jonathan swallowed and tentatively slid his hands inside Billy's open jacket and pressed them to the dip of his lower back. "I missed you. I always miss you." 

Those lips curved in a smile against his own and kissed him softly as hands slid under his t-shirt on to bare skin, leaving a trail of goose bumps. He never knew quite what to do with himself when Billy acted so sweetly, never knew how long it would last. 

"Been so long since I had my hands on you." Their lips met again as Billy pulled the worn jacket down Jonathan's arms and tossed it aside. 

It had almost been three weeks since their last run in, a rough fumble behind an abandoned house Jonathan had been checking out. Billy had never left it that long and he had started to hope and fear that they were done. 

Billy leaned back to pull Jonathan's t-shirt over his head. "Thought you might not want it anymore." 

"I'll never stop wanting it." The truest words he had ever spoken. 

Hands gripped his belt, tugging him forward as Billy walked backwards to the bed, eyes locked on each other. A light push broke the connection, sending him on to the bed. Billy quickly followed, crawling over him and fusing their mouths together. It was no longer sweet but no less intense as Billy took control. Jonathan couldn't help but curl his fingers into the mess of hair, a thing he had found he quite liked. 

One hand slipped between them and yanked his belt open, popping the button and easing down the fly with practiced ease. Billy tore his mouth away and slid off the bed, getting rid of Jonathan's socks and shoes as Jonathan looked up at the water-stained ceiling, chest heaving already. He lifted his hips obediently as his jeans and underwear were dragged down his legs. Once again, he was entirely naked before the other boy. 

He waited for the warmth of that body to return to him but he grew colder. Cautiously, he sat up and blushed again at finding Billy staring down at him, head tilted to the side with a frown of confusion. 

"Why do you let me do this?" 

Jonathan held out a tentative hand. "Because I need it." _Maybe more than you_. 

Billy took it and allowed himself to be pulled back over Jonathan, their kisses turned tender again as Jonathan wrapped his limbs around the other to keep him close. 

"Take it off," Jonathan mumbled between kisses. 

"What?" Clothed hips twitched against his bare skin. 

"Everything." 

Billy propped himself up on straightened arms, framing Jonathan's head. There was a flicker of uncertainty. "We've never..." 

Never both been completely naked. Jonathan's complete nudity was always a part of Billy's ownership of him. He had never really tried to push against it before but there was something different tonight. A new kind of tension but he didn't know why. 

"Please." 

Billy stepped onto the floor again but pulled Jonathan up with him until he was sat up. He fished the familiar jar of lube he had taken to carrying around with him a couple months ago and tossed it towards Jonathan. 

"Prep yourself and it's a deal." There was that cocky grin Jonathan couldn't help but be drawn to yet that wasn't what fuelled his own confidence. That came from the anxious little look that escaped Billy's mask. Those flashes of reality behind the arrogant front drew him like a moth to a flame or something like that. 

He knelt up and spread his legs as he unscrewed the jar and slicked up his fingers. Never breaking eye contact, he reached behind himself and carefully pressed the digit inside. He bit his lip and whimpered. It should be embarrassing, doing that and being watched, but this was nothing really and Jonathan was determined to see how much further he could crack the chink in Billy's armour tonight before he was cut off again and returned to a nervous wreck. 

But Billy wasn't making a move and Jonathan's stomach twisted. Was he getting ahead of himself and falling into another trap? He ground to a halt, two fingers buried inside himself. "Should I st-?" 

"Keep going." Billy shrugged out of his jacket and made quick work of the buttons on his shirt, freeing himself from that too. Jonathan's cock stiffened further if it was even possible at the display of hard-earned muscle he hoped he would never get used to. Worn boots were kicked into the darkened corners and Jonathan pressed another finger inside himself as those tight jeans were pushed down firm thighs, no underwear underneath. Jonathan's eyes landed on Billy's erection and a shudder ran through him. He had so many memories associated with it of fear and pain but also longing and intense pleasure. 

Billy stood naked before him for the first time and for a moment Jonathan started to doubt himself. Maybe it was better to have that boundary, better to be less real and equal. Then Billy was pushing him backwards again, kneeling between his thighs, and Jonathan was hurriedly coating Billy's cock in lube before he lost the chance. 

The head nudged against already tender skin and Jonathan barely had chance to take a breath before Billy was easing inside of him, rolling his hips and blindly seeking out Jonathan's mouth as their bodies pressed tight together. Jonathan whined into the kiss, back arching when Billy raked that spot inside of him. He clung desperately to the other, hissing through clenched teeth when Billy abandoned the kiss for Jonathan's throat, sinking his teeth into the skin as his thrusts grew harder. 

He hadn't touched himself on his own time since Billy had first had him and his body was so attuned to the other's that he was certain they were both close already. He reached down between their bodies and had his hand instantly knocked aside. 

"How many times do I have to tell you that this is mine?" Billy trailed his tongue along Jonathan's ear and jerked his cock in time with his own thrusts as he had done so many times before. 

Jonathan cried out as he came, days of tension bleeding out of him. Billy followed close behind and slumped against Jonathan's body, face pressed against his shoulder as they fought to catch their breath. Jonathan's head was spinning and Billy's weight pressing him into the mattress was only a good thing, still intimately connected. Billy was usually quick to tear himself away but he was lingering tonight, continuing to add to the list of un-Billy-like behaviour Jonathan was compiling in his more lucid moments. He turned his head and brushed his lips to the other's hair, hands making little patterns as they lay against Billy's sides. He was utterly content and that worried him. 

"What's wrong?" He asked carefully, voice barely above a whisper in hope that whatever spell they were under wouldn't be broken. 

"Everything," Billy mumbled into his shoulder. “I’m not going to talk about it. Not yet.” 

What could he say to that? He kept quiet and decided to just enjoy the moment for a while. He focused on how Billy’s chest moved against his own with every breath, how it tickled his shoulder. They stayed like that so long Jonathan could convince himself they were one person. 

How sleep-deprived was he? 

A little noise escaped him when Billy finally stood up and stretched, and Jonathan’s body instantly grew cold without the other pressed against him. His eyes slid shut as he listened to Billy move to the bathroom and turn the tap on. A wet cloth landed on Jonathan’s outstretched arm and his eyes snapped open. 

“Clean up.” Billy gestured at him and bent down to grab his jeans off the floor. 

That was new. Billy had never shown a hint of caring about what happened after. More to the point, it was the first time he had spoken to Jonathan straight after sex. As he cleaned himself off and sat up to watch Billy re-dress, he tried to puzzle it out. Why were things so different tonight? Little things to others that felt like monumental changes to him when he had grown so used to certain consistencies. The places they went and how they went about it were a little varied but Jonathan was beginning to realise he relied on some things being constants. 

Billy pulled out his keys and headed to the door. Jonathan’s stomach cramped in anxiety as Billy’s hand wrapped around the door handle. 

“A-are you coming back?” 

_Please don’t leave me._

“Yeah.” 

That was all he got as Billy walked right out and shut the door behind him. He had to hope that was true or he was stuck God knew where. More than a little bit of himself doubted Billy. 

He burrowed under the covers, back to the door so he wouldn’t stare at it, and clutched what would be Billy’s pillow to his chest, pressing his face into the lumpy stuffing. It was too quiet out here. No noises from the other rooms or the car park and none of what he was used to either. Will running around, their mom too, and the creaking of the house. Was it embarrassing to admit – even just to himself – that he was more than a little scared? It didn’t help that he had no idea where the hell he was. Probably should have spent less time staring at Billy and kept his eyes on the road. 

What was he going to do if Billy didn’t come back? He squeezed his eyes shut and gripped the pillow even tighter. When he was little and had had a bad day, his mom would put him to bed and promise him that whatever was upsetting him in that moment wouldn’t matter when he woke up. More often than not she was right. 

\--- 

“Nngh.” Jonathan was brought out of his sleep by a warm, bare arm sliding along his stomach and drawing him back against an equally bare body. It was pitch black in the room but Jonathan knew that body almost as well as his own. 

“You’re a pillow thief, Byers,” Billy muttered against the back of Jonathan’s neck and the smell of cigarettes crept up his nose. 

“You came back.” 

“Told you I would.” 

Billy nestled perfectly against him and, despite everything, Jonathan felt comfortable and safe in his arms. He tentatively slid a hand over the one Billy had pressed to his stomach. 

“I’ve never been held like this before,” he whispered, mostly to himself. Still that question of why though. 

Billy sighed, Maybe he could feel the uncertainty pouring out of Jonathan. “Tomorrow. We’ll talk then. I’ll tell you everything,” he promised. 

“Has something else happened?” He couldn’t help but ask. 

“I...yeah.” 

“Tomorrow then.” 

\--- 

Waking up to soft kisses along the back of his neck was pretty nice. The heat of the body behind him and the arm wrapped around, keeping him close, was even better. 

“You’re still here.” He yawned and tightened his grip on the hand resting on his belly. 

“Nowhere else I want to be.” 

He was desperate to believe that. Jonathan turned around and blindly sought out the other’s lips, eyes still heavy with sleep. Billy met him halfway and everything was slow and sweet and just unimaginably brilliant. Little shivers raced along his skin as he drew closer, hands wandering along the body in front of him, desperate to keep him in place, for it to be real. 

But the bubble burst, at least a little, as Jonathan’s fingers slid along Billy’s back and pressed against a raised lump. Billy hissed, jerking back, and Jonathan’s eyes snapped open in alarm as he quickly drew his hand away. 

“What was...?” He began to ask but the look of shame and the red colour flooding Billy’s face stopped him dead. Billy made to leap up and Jonathan just knew if he let him leave this time he wouldn’t be back. People like Billy didn’t cope well with embarrassment. Jonathan lunged forward and gripped Billy’s wrist. “Wait!” 

Billy was jerked back on to the bed but twisted himself so Jonathan could neither see his face nor his back. “Get off me,” he ordered through gritted teeth. 

“No.” Where this courage had been hiding all his life, Jonathan would question later, but right now he was just glad to have it. He rose on to his knees and tentatively shuffled forward, keeping his grip firm though he was under no illusion that if Billy really wanted to go he’d be off. But it was that he hadn’t broken free that Jonathan clung on to. “Has someone hurt you? Is this what you were talking about yesterday?” 

Jonathan watched and waited what felt like forever for Billy to finally make a little nod. 

“Oh.” His mind went blank – he didn’t know what to say. For someone to have hurt Billy, a guy who picked fights like it was his sole purpose in life, and caused this reaction would have been unbelievable if he wasn’t looking at the evidence right in front of him. And not just that but last night too. 

Billy whipped his head round and practically snarled at Jonathan. “Yeah, ‘oh’. Or do you think I can’t be hurt? That I do deserve it? Because I would if I were you.” 

It was obvious he was more upset than angry but Jonathan still fought not to shrink away from the intensity of it directed at him. But as Billy glared at him, the dull light caught his suspiciously wet eyes and in that moment all Jonathan wanted to do was hold the other boy close. 

“I don’t think any of that,” he spoke softly, determined to keep his voice steady. “No one deserves to be hurt.” 

_Even those that let themselves be._

He tugged lightly on Billy’s wrist. “Why don’t we lie down again? And talk, like you said last night?” 

Billy leant towards him just a little yet he stiffened up again and practically deflated before Jonathan, head hung low and shoulders drooping. “Aren’t you disgusted? I feel so pathetic.” 

Jonathan bit his lip in thought before he spoke again. Of course the answer was no. But it made him think of himself and a question that had been on his mind for some time. “Do I disgust you when I let you have me so easily? When I let you hurt me and don’t fight back?” He knew the answer – he disgusted everybody, a fact drilled in to him all his life. “You think it makes me less of a man. That’s why you started this, remember?” He was supposed to be comforting but he couldn’t help himself. 

Billy’s eyes were back on his again and he was holding Jonathan’s arm with his other hand now. “Don’t be stupid. That’s not what this is or, well, it hasn’t been since I don’t know when. I remember what I said, that I wanted to lower you to raise me up, but that was bullshit. I keep coming back because you make me feel good, Byers. Like someone needs me but it’s me that needs you. I don’t know,” he sighed. “It’s like healing or something.” 

He didn’t know what to say. This boy in front of him, his tormentor in too many ways to count, had just poured his heart out, had told him things he never thought he would hear. It made it all so much more real, so much easier to know he was doing the right thing now, that being drawn to Billy wasn’t entirely toxic. 

“So let me heal you.” Jonathan let go of Billy’s wrist reluctantly as he lay back down, his back facing the other. He suspected Billy had held him like that to keep his own back out of sight and hoped the position would draw him in. Still, and despite what had just been said, he felt more than a little vulnerable himself turning his back naked as he was. But before he could fully tense up Billy was settling down and holding him close once again. 

“Why do you keep doing this? You should hate me,” Billy muttered against him. 

Jonathan took several deep breaths to calm his forever racing mind. “I want to sometimes, I really do, but I just can’t. You’re...” Not that long ago he had walked along a road, mind full of Billy, and he had decided exactly what the other was. “...a sickness.” The other stiffened against him. “But I don’t want the cure.” He pictured Nancy. “It’s not strong enough anymore.” 

Billy fell silent and Jonathan hoped he hadn’t scared him off with his sudden lack of filter. But yet again he stayed put beside him and Jonathan allowed himself to relax again and enjoy the moment, though being held was still weird even if it was a good kind of weird. 

Everything wasn’t suddenly okay. Each time he remembered Billy hurting him still made him cringe but he had something to work on, a foundation. And his mom had always told him the foundation was the most important part of anything. If that was shot you had nothing. But he had Billy at least for a little a while. 

Things were quiet for a good while and Jonathan was starting to get the impression that they were both just listening to each other breathe, too pent up, nervous or something to actually sleep again. Well, he was nervous at any rate and felt like he’d never slept so much in one go as he had over the last 24 hours. 

His fingers were getting that familiar itch again, though, to capture the moment with his camera. Not to look back on for some sentimental reason but because he was damn sure that Billy looked incredibly beautiful right then. All that bare tanned skin glowing against the beige bed sheet and low light leaking into the room, hair a perfect mess, face relaxed. He shivered in pleasure at the image he had created, a breathy moan breaking the silence. Fingers twitched against his stomach. 

“What are you thinking about?” Billy whispered. 

“How beautiful I bet you look right now.” The newfound confidence hadn’t deserted him yet, apparently. 

Billy’s hand crept a little lower down Jonathan’s stomach. “And what do you wanna do about it?” 

His fingers were practically twitching by that point. “Take a photo. A lot of photos.” 

The hand pulled back completely and Jonathan instantly felt cold, waiting for the rejection and insults. The mattress squeaked as Billy shuffled back. 

“Okay.” 

Jonathan whipped around and just stared at Billy and his easy smile before he could even think of words. “R-really?” He had wanted to do this for what felt like forever and now the chance was dangling before him. He pulled himself onto his knees and looked down on Billy lying on his side, propped up on an elbow. “Are you serious?” 

The second Billy nodded, Jonathan leaped off the bed and near enough ripped the dresser drawer open to snatch his camera up. With it in his hands, he took a moment to breathe and calm down. 

_You’re an artist, Jonathan. You can do amazing things with this if you just believe._

He smiled to himself while messing with the settings as he recalled the words his mom had spoken to him when she gave him his very first camera. 

“You know.” Billy’s teasing voice came from behind. “You’re not so bad from that angle yourself.” 

Jonathan’s face burned in embarrassment. It had slipped his mind that he was (obviously) naked too and had given Billy a good long view of his backside. He placed the camera down and grabbed his jeans from the floor, ignoring Billy’s protests as he pulled them up. He wouldn’t be able to concentrate with Billy leering at him anyway. 

He picked up the camera again and turned towards his model. “Lie back the way you were.” 

“But you’re not here,” Billy grumbled as he resettled himself, arm splayed across the mattress where Jonathan had been only a few minutes ago. 

He drew the viewfinder to his eye and toyed with the settings again, lining up the shot. Yes, the light was practically caressing those strong limbs. He met Billy’s eyes through the camera and without thinking took the shot. 

“Oh,” Jonathan gasped in surprise, staring at the camera like it had done it itself. Billy arched an eyebrow at him and Jonathan mentally shook himself. 

_Get a grip._

“Close your eyes and relax your mouth as if you were sleeping,” he ordered and brought the camera back up. He was enjoying pouring over Billy’s body through the lens as a somewhat objective artist rather than an addict. 

Jonathan continued to take shots, having Billy make minute adjustments, creeping steadily closer rather than use the zoom like he should. He had Billy flat on his back, head turned to the side with one arm curled loosely over the top. Jonathan himself was kneeling beside him, spine arched at an awkward angle as he attempted to line up his shot. He huffed in exasperation. The angle was ever so slightly off. 

Billy peered at him. “Why don’t you just climb over me if you’re trying to get it head on.” 

Jonathan paused to consider it. That actually wasn’t a bad idea and he was so intent on getting it right he didn’t even think about what it might look like as he framed Billy’s hips with his knees and tried again. Perfect. The shutter clicked. 

Jonathan had barely lowered the camera before Billy was surging up and drawing their mouths together, swallowing the undignified squeak of surprise Jonathan very nearly let out. He reached out blindly and deposited his camera on the bedside table before he allowed the other to drag them firmly together. His growing erection pressed tight against his jeans. As his hips twitched towards Billy, he got a thrill from the role reversal. He was the one still partly dressed and pressing down a completely naked body. 

He broke the kiss and leant back to look down at where his jeans were pressed against Billy’s cock. His own throbbed and he ground forward, groaning at the sensation and the whine he drew from Billy. He did it again and again, rocking firmly, not looking away. 

Billy gripped his hips tightly. “You trying to rub me raw?” He grunted, hands moving along the denim to cup Jonathan’s ass. 

“You’ve done it to me enough times,” he bit back, tilting forward now to mouth at Billy’s neck. He sank his teeth into the smooth skin as Billy squeezed his ass tightly. 

“Is that how it is, Byers? Trying to get one up on me?” He laughed. “I wouldn’t count on it.” 

Billy had him on his back, jeans already halfway down his legs before Jonathan’s hazy brain could catch up. The second his legs were free Billy was on top of him, rutting against him with a vengeance. Jonathan whined and arched up, struggling to breathe he was panting so hard. He couldn’t deny he loved the weight of Billy’s sweat slick body on top of him like that but something had gotten into him when he had pressed his denim covered crotch against Billy moments before. He wanted... 

With all the strength he could muster, Jonathan rolled them over. Billy’s hips froze in surprise as Jonathan held himself above the other. However, he didn’t fail to miss the grimace of discomfort as Billy resettled his back. 

Jonathan’s eyes widened. “Your back! I’d forgotten about it this whole time. Is it alright? Do you-” His words ran away from him on the nervous buzz of energy racing through him after his move. 

Billy clenched a fist in Jonathan’s hair and jerked him down into a kiss. “Forget it again, it’s fine.” He bucked his hips up to remind Jonathan of where they had been headed. “So what’s this all about?” 

He let the issue of Billy’s back drop for now. Again. “I want you to fuck me.” He managed not to stutter though his face was flaming again. “But like this.” 

Billy grinned. “You wanna ride me, Byers? I’m sure as hell not going to stop you.” 

Billy shifted up to rest against the headboard, nudging Jonathan’s legs further apart with his own. They made quick work of the prep and, what felt like barely a moment later, Jonathan found himself stretched around Billy’s cock, his thigh muscles twitching as he forced himself to wait. Billy held his gaze while his fingers trailed along Jonathan’s sides, settling on his hips. 

“Bet you wish you could take a photo of this too,” Billy smirked. 

Jonathan huffed in amusement and ducked his head to hide his blush. “I always thought dirty pictures were a waste of film but now... Well, I don’t think I know much of anything anymore except this.” He planted one hand on the wall in front of him, looped the other across Billy’s shoulders and drove himself up and down the length inside him as hard as he could. 

Air raced out of his mouth as quickly as it came in and he couldn’t help but cry out as Billy thrust up to meet Jonathan, driving hard enough into him that he knew he would be sore later. But he didn’t care. Everything ached and he could barely breathe but he wouldn’t want to be anywhere else. 

“Billy...!” He whined, his own cock throbbing and untouched. But Billy shook his head and drew him into a hard yet brief kiss. His hands remained firmly planted on Jonathan’s hips. 

“You wanted to be in charge, Byers, so work for it.” 

Jonathan all but whimpered, his legs burning and skin slick from exertion. “I can’t do it,” he gasped. “I’m trying but please...!” 

Strong fingers finally wrapped around him and Jonathan felt a second wave of energy crash through him, guiding him on as he fought to bring off the perfect demon beneath him. 

“Fuck, I can’t say no to you. You’re so-!” 

Jonathan never got to hear what Billy was going to say as the hand around his cock tightened and sent him crashing over the edge, his teeth latching onto Billy’s shoulder hard to swallow the scream, making the other cry out instead. He attempted to keep going for Billy’s sake but he was so lightheaded and slick with sweat and spend that he barely acknowledged Billy pushing him onto his back. He shuddered contentedly, sensitive and sore as Billy managed to pound into him just a few more times before coming with a cry. 

Billy flopped down on his back beside him, fingers twisted together, chests heaving and growing cold from skin slick with sweat and cum. Jonathan gazed up at the dirty ceiling while he waited for his brain to right itself. He glanced at Billy and found the other already watching him. Jonathan tightened his grip on Billy’s hand. 

“Talk,” he ordered as firmly as he dared. 

Billy arched an eyebrow and snorted as he shifted onto his side. “What, now?” He let go of Jonathan’s hand to trail his fingers through the mess on his stomach. “With all this on you?” 

Jonathan was determined not to be put off again. He reclaimed the hand as he also turned on his side and met amused yet wary eyes. “Please don’t put me off. I care about you and that’s genuine. Do you understand?” He asked earnestly, hoping desperately that Billy was starting to feel what he was. And even if he wasn’t and it was all part of the sickness in Jonathan’s head, he couldn’t let Billy’s drastic change of behaviour go unmentioned. It would drive him mad. 

Billy frowned and bit his lip, a copy of his own nervous giveaway. “I want to. But how can I trust that after everything I’ve done to you? 

Jonathan shrugged. He wished he had an answer to that as well but it was like running in circles trying to apply any logic to how he felt towards Billy. “You’ll have to trust in the strength of my addiction.” He brushed their lips together. 

Billy started to sit up. “How about a shower first?” He didn’t get far at all as Jonathan’s iron tight grip on his hand kept him grounded. “The hell, Byers?” 

“You’re not going anyway. Quit putting me off.” He tangled their legs together for extra measure. He could be as stubborn as a mule when he wanted to be and self-preservation was overrated anyway. 

“What was all that about trust?” Billy huffed as he reluctantly resettled. 

Jonathan’s mouth twitched. “Never said I was a dumb addict.” 

“You’re a dumb something, alright.” 

Jonathan chose not to react to that, catching the gleam of amusement in the other’s eyes. Instead, he reached out cautiously and took one of Billy’s hands in his own, drawing it up between their chests. “Is this okay?” He spoke softly, transfixed by Billy’s gaze. Another part of him Jonathan found stunning now that he had been given the chance to study it. 

Billy shrugged and squeezed Jonathan’s hand. “Why not? I don’t remember what right and wrong is anymore. This wasn’t exactly my plan, you know?” 

“Which part?” He wasn’t entirely sure he wanted to know the answer. Actually, he wasn’t sure in the slightest. 

“Being here, touching you and about to have a conversation I’ve been avoiding for _years_. Byers, you in every way were not the plan.” Billy rolled his eyes, huffing again. “I keep coming back to you and even when I try and stay away you show up anyway! What am I supposed to do? God...” 

And what was he supposed to say to that? It wasn’t like Jonathan had some grand plan either. Plus, as far as he was concerned, he was acting pretty normally for what typically went on between them whereas he couldn’t even guess at what Billy would do next. Talking so much to him and after sex, not when he was ‘persuading’ him into it, holding him, touching him. Just looking at him! He was half petrified at the thought of how much more it would hurt after all that if Billy were to go back to ignoring him. But he was getting distracted again. 

“Tell me about your back. It was your dad, wasn’t it?” 

Billy nodded, dropping his gaze. “We got into this big bust up about something stupid like always. It didn’t feel any different to the other times. I was just waiting for the moment when he would throw me against the wall and scream in my face. Tell me to call him sir. And,” Billy shrugged. “He did and I told him what he wanted to hear but he didn’t stop. He didn’t back off.” 

Billy’s voice grew quieter with every word. If Jonathan hadn’t been pressed so close he could feel Billy shiver against him he would have struggled to hear. 

“What did he do?” Jonathan began to run his hands through Billy’s hair, hoping the other would find it as comforting as he did. 

“He pulled his belt and told me to take me shirt off and turn around. I just stared at him, couldn’t believe he was actually going to do what it looked like he was. What sort of man beats his own _son_ with a belt?” Billy’s voice trembled along with the rest of him. “He told me he’d had enough trying to talk sense into me so he’d have a go at beating it instead. I-I couldn’t fight him off or run away. It was like I was frozen or something. I was waiting for him to change his mind right up until the first smack. And then he wouldn’t stop no matter how much I screamed and begged. I couldn’t breathe properly and no one came to help.” He shuddered and pressed his face against Jonathan’s shoulder. 

Jonathan thought he was going to be sick, the way his stomach cramped and twisted. Was it from what Billy had said or what it had done to him? Jonathan had known for a good while that so much of Billy’s anger came from his dad. He wasn’t much different himself on some days. But Billy had never quit before, never shown how much it eats away at you like this. They really were so alike. Two scared boys hurt by one of the people that was supposed to always protect them. 

“It’s going to be okay,” he soothed, keeping Billy’s shaking body close. “Remember you’re safe here.” Everyone would call him a glutton for punishment comforting his frequent attacker but he couldn’t give a damn. There was an urge impossible to ignore to fix this boy’s world any way possible and Jonathan was a slave to it. 

“It still stings.” 

Jonathan cringed inwardly at having probably made it hurt more with what they’d been doing. “Have you cleaned it up at all yet?” 

Billy shook his head against his shoulder. “Not really, just enough that my shirt wouldn’t stick. I had to get out of that house.” 

So he’d jumped in his car and gone. “Were you running away?” Had he run away and taken Jonathan along for the ride? 

Billy shrugged again. “I don’t know. I was just driving and then I spotted you and took it as a sign.” He pressed a kiss to Jonathan’s shoulder. “Why did you come with me? After everything, why are you here with me?” 

_Because I’m in love with you._

He kissed the top of Billy’s head. “I’ll tell you some other time.” 

“Maybe I’m addicted too.” 

Jonathan snorted and tugged on Billy’s hair. “Don’t tease me. Come on.” He pulled away and made to slide off the bed, wincing at the stiffness in his limbs. When had he last properly walked? And, for that matter, what time was it? There was no window in the room so Jonathan had been living in a timeless and poorly lit world. His stomach gargled and he wrapped his arms around himself self-consciously, glancing back at the bed. 

Billy had sat up and, to Jonathan’s mind, looked almost fragile and uncertain in the way he was holding himself, the truth in the open. Yet his mouth was twitching, fighting off a smile. “Hungry?” 

He rolled his eyes, choosing not to be embarrassed for once in his life. “Come on.” He held his hand out and pulled Billy onto his feet and to the bathroom. A quick tug of the greasy string of the light switch lit up the grungy bathroom. Shower over bath, toilet, sink, mirror and stack of towels. “Sit.” He gestured at the down-turned toilet lid and grabbed a small towel. 

The pipes groaned in protest at Jonathan’s outrageous request for warm (not even hot) water. Neither of them made a sound while they waited and he once again became acutely away of being stood naked with someone else in the room, of all the many flaws of his body. 

He pulled the soaked towel from the tepid water and turned to Billy who had shut his eyes and let his head fall back against the wall behind him. Jonathan took a steadying breath and began, moving in a perfect balance of methodical and worshipful as he wiped away the hours of muck from Billy’s firm body. The first half was over sooner than he would have liked. He stepped back to ring out the towel again and re-soak it. 

“Turn around,” he ordered softly. He tried to steel himself, shouldn’t have even needed to considering the things he’d seen in the not too distant past. But the destruction demonic creatures made was one thing and vicious fathers another. 

The broad expanse of once perfect skin was covered in pink scratches, red welts and purpling bruises. More than a few of the lines had cut deeper and looked like they had really bled. As he tracked the lines it became obvious just how many times Billy had been struck. 

Jonathan swallowed down the urge to gag and reached out with the towel, wishing he had something softer. He rubbed away the remaining blood and edged carefully around the rawest wounds. They didn’t look infected but Jonathan’s medical knowledge was virtually non-existent so maybe it wouldn’t hurt to find something better than water at the drug store. 

“I’m done,” he muttered. There was nothing else he could do right then and there was only so long he could bear to look at it. 

As Billy turned towards him and soaked a smaller towel, Jonathan noted the pink blush on his cheeks. “How bad is it?” He asked nervously as he returned the favour. 

“Please don’t go back to that house.” 

“Where would I go?” 

“Anywhere else is better. If he’s gone this far once, he’ll do it again. Was he even sorry? Did he tell you?” A spark of anger on Billy’s behalf was threatening to catch alight. He barely even noticed his more personal areas being scrubbed. All he could think of was waking up one day and reading in the paper _’Local boy beaten to death.’_

Billy shook his head as he let the towel drop with a slap into the sink. “Like hell did he say sorry. You know what he said to me? One day I’d thank him.” 

Jonathan pulled Billy far too easily into his arms. “I can’t let you go there. You’re not going.” 

Strong arms looped around him, lips brushing the side of his neck. “Are you gonna protect me?” 

“Do you trust me to?” 

The arms tightened and those wandering lips found his just for a moment. “I hope so.” 

They held on to each other, at peace until Jonathan’s stomach gurgled again. 

Billy laughed and pulled away. “Okay, already. Let’s get something to eat.” 

Jonathan smiled at Billy’s light mood and the easy way he strolled out of the bathroom despite the mess of his back. He was going to enjoy this side while it was here. 

\--- 

Jonathan barely restrained himself from snatching the glass of soda from the server as it was placed on the scratched table of their diner booth. He gulped down half of it, letting the icy liquid soothe his dry throat and signal to his clenching stomach that something was coming to it. 

Billy arched an eyebrow and grinned at him. “Thirsty?” He pointedly sipped from his beer bottle as Jonathan sat his glass back down and rolled his eyes. 

“I can’t remember the last time I had a drink. Or ate, actually.” He’d barely eaten at all yesterday. Maybe half a bowl of cereal, the end of the box. That, on top of all the _physical activity_ he had been doing, lead to him intently eyeballing their server, waiting for the moment when he would deliver their food order. 

“Not taking good care of you, am I?” Billy continued to tease, relaxing back into the cracked vinyl seat. 

_When do you ever?_

Jonathan shrugged off the ugly thought, forcing himself to remember how they had been tangled together not that long ago, how Billy had held him and cleaned his body. That was new and different. 

“Next time bring snacks.” 

Finally, finally, finally the most beautiful hamburger was placed before him. The dull light from outside and the overhanging lights above them did not do justice to the masterpiece before him. A thick patty, strips of crispy bacon and melting cheese cradled in between a bun and dripping in grease, perched against a mountain of golden fries. His stomach cramped one last time when he seized the burger and brought it to his mouth, biting into the juicy meat with a blissful moan. This was heaven. 

A foot brushed against his under the table and he glanced up to see Billy obviously trying not to laugh as he swallowed his own mouthful. “Never thought I’d be jealous of a burger.” 

Jonathan gave Billy the finger as he took another big bite, instantly satisfied as Billy choked on his beer. He swallowed and reached for the ketchup bottle as the other wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. A sickeningly large pool of the red sauce dribbled down the pile of fries. 

“Seriously though, how long have we been out of Hawkins for?” Jonathan asked and crammed a handful of fries into his mouth. 

Billy shrugged and gestured to the clock hanging behind the counter. “Just over a day, I guess. It’s already gone six p.m.” 

How the hell was it that late? Jonathan knew he had been sleep deprived beforehand but they must have slept for the best part of the day. No wonder he had been starving though why Billy wasn’t... 

“When you disappeared last night, did you go for food?” He asked, laying on the suspicion heavily. 

Billy had the grace to look a little guilty. “I might have done. I needed to get out for a breather and I didn’t think about you. Sorry.” 

Jonathan nudged his leg against Billy’s. “It’s alright. I’ve gone through worse than not eating for a day, you know. And I don’t mean you,” he corrected hurriedly as Billy obviously cringed. 

“What’s worse than what I did? You knew what I’ve been saying was bullshit, right? That it gives me power back?” 

They were going to have that conversation then. 

“Yeah, I figured it out. You were scared.” 

Billy flushed red in anger, spluttering “I was not-!” 

Jonathan reached out and gripped Billy’s forearm. “You were. I would be too, Billy. Your dad was hurting you and you had no one else to go to who would say it would be alright. I wish you hadn’t done what you did and you have to know I haven’t forgiven you yet.” 

Billy tugged his arm free and crossed them. “If you haven’t, then what are we doing? I’m trying to be real with you here.” He looked more fragile than angry. 

“Me too. The thing is, I kind of need you but I can’t really explain it.” Jonathan plucked the straw from his soda and twiddled it between his fingers. “I’m not trying to fix you exactly – me of all people – but being the one you come to gives me a purpose. You want me. Don’t you?” He asked self-consciously. 

Billy sighed, tipping his head back as his eyes shut. “So much. I couldn’t...can’t think of anyone else. Tried to.” 

“Me too.” 

Billy cracked an eye open. “Keep coming back to you without even trying.” 

They stared at each other for a good while, Jonathan thinking of a dozen options of where they could go from here, until the spell was broken by their server asking if there was anything else they needed. 

“Oh, no we’re fine,” Jonathan mumbled, a little flustered. He picked up his burger and continued on valiantly with his meal. Just as he shoved his empty plate to the side and lifted his soda cup, Billy slid out from his seat and squeezed onto Jonathan’s. He could feel the heat radiating from the other as Billy brought his mouth to Jonathan’s ear. 

“Wanna know what I’m thinking about?” Billy’s breath tickled his skin. 

Jonathan shivered in anticipation and nodded. 

“When we get back you’re gonna take off all those clothes and I’m gonna go down on you. You want that?” 

Jonathan nodded, praying that no one else could see his scarlet face. His cock twitched at the mental image Billy was creating. 

“Then I’ll fuck you against the wall and you’ll scream for me, won’t you?” His tongue trailed along the edge of Jonathan’s ear. 

“God, yes,” Jonathan groaned. He froze when a hand crept along his thigh. “What are you doing?” 

Billy chuckled darkly, making Jonathan’s toes curl up. “Letting everyone know that you’re mine.” 

“Like that’s not obvious.” 

\--- 

“Jesus!” Jonathan whined, his bare back arching off the sheets he was desperately gripping in his fists. 

He couldn’t see him but Billy laughed and bit the inside of Jonathan’s thigh. “Always thought of myself as more of a devil, actually, but I’ll be your God.” 

Jonathan would build shrines if Billy would just put his mouth back where it had been. 

“Please!” 

Billy made quick work of him, tearing him to pieces before gathering him close. Jonathan shuddered and fought to catch his breath, face buried against Billy’s neck. 

“Can we take a break?” he mumbled, eyes drooping shut as he pressed himself closer. 

“We just did, remember? I fed you.” Billy prodded him lightly in the ribs. 

“Exactly. It was heavy food.” The ‘argument’ was taking an odd turn but Jonathan was encouraged by how relaxed the other felt against him and the hand trailing along his back. 

“Sounds like an excuse to me. Don’t you want me to fuck you against the wall or would you rather we take it outside? I don’t mind sharing how you sound.” 

Jonathan moaned helplessly at the thought of the other guests hearing what Billy did to him. Doing something like that was a line they hadn’t crossed yet. 

“You have no idea, but, I want this too.” He brought their mouths together and they moved as one, drawing each other impossibly closer. 

“How about we never leave here again,” Billy whispered into Jonathan’s ear, tracing the edge with his tongue. “Fuck Hawkins and fuck everyone in it.” 

Jonathan nodded, the words trickling from Billy’s mouth to his brain as slow as thick syrup. There wasn’t much he wouldn’t have agreed to if it kept Billy touching him. 

“They won’t miss us,” Billy continued. “No parents or stupid kids – just us.” 

It felt like ice travelling through his body in a heartbeat and his breath caught in his throat as he jerked out of Billy’s embrace, staring at him in horror. 

“Fuck!” Jonathan launched himself from the bed and scrambled into his clothes, nearly tripping over as he got tangled in his jeans. 

“What?” Billy watched him in some alarm and, for a second, with hurt. 

“No one knows where I am! I can’t just disappear. They might think-” Jonathan forced himself to shut up as he shoved himself through his t-shirt. He didn’t want Billy knowing about the ‘other’ world if he could help it. “My mom hasn’t heard from me since yesterday morning and now it’s...” He trailed off. He had no idea. 

“Go home then,” Billy bit out sourly and slumped back onto his pillow. 

Jonathan bit his lip uncertainly, mentally and physically torn between running out of their room to find some way of getting word out that he was safe and going to Billy to comfort him. The answer was obvious yet he found himself once again framing Billy’s bare hips with his clothed knees as he settled over him. 

“I’m sorry but I have to let somebody know I’m safe.” 

Billy refused to look at him. Jonathan watched his jaw tense and frown lines crease his brow. 

“Do what you want.” 

Jonathan scraped up a little more courage and gripped Billy’s chin, forcing him to look up as Jonathan leant down until the tips of their noses were almost brushing. “I want this.” He kissed Billy far too briefly. “But I have to sort this out or I won’t be able to concentrate on us.” He knew he was saying stupid things however, they were working. 

Billy nodded and shoved Jonathan off him after one more kiss. “There’s a pay phone in the reception, change in my pocket.” He gestured towards the jacket half hanging off the dresser. 

“Thank you.” 

Jonathan sprinted along the walkway and down the stairs towards the office. The sky wasn’t far from being completely black, filling Jonathan with a level of anxious fear he hadn’t felt in some time. The man in the reception barely acknowledged Jonathan as he slammed into the small room and snatched the black plastic phone from his hook, holding it between his shoulder and ear as he looked at his fistful of change and took a moment to actually recall his home number. He shoved coins into the slot and jerked the rotary dial, adjusting the ear piece at the last number and waiting for it to start ringing. 

_”This number is currently unavailable. Please disconnect. This number is curr-”_

“Damn it, mom!” He hissed, shoving the phone back into the receiver. Either his mom or Will had unplugged the phone again or their power had gone out. Considering Jonathan had been missing for the best part of two days, he would have thought his mom would make damn sure the phone was working in case he called. 

He had one option left – the only other number he had bothered to memorise. He glanced up at the clock positioned above the door. Nearly 9 o’clock. Jonathan sighed, dialled the number and prayed that the right person would answer as the phone finally rang out. It only took a few rings. 

“Hello, Wheeler residence,” a polite yet strained voice answered and a little of Jonathan’s tension released. 

“Nancy?” 

“Jonathan!” Nancy shrieked down the line so loudly he jerked the ear piece back reflexively. “Jonathan, please tell me that’s you,” she begged. 

Jonathan cringed guiltily, twisting the phone cord between his fingers. “Yeah, it is. Listen-” 

“Where the hell have you been?” Nancy snapped. “You’ve been gone for two days – two days! - and we were all convinced that you’d been taken-” 

“All?” Jonathan couldn’t help but ask despite how pissed Nancy sounded. 

“Yeah, all. Your mom’s practically tearing her hair out, Will’s not much better plus me, Steve and the boys have been looking everywhere.” She paused, making sure Jonathan felt as guilty as humanly possible “You know, you’re not the only person missing. Billy Hargrove is gone too and all I could think about was Barb.” Her voice trembled a little at the mention of her friend. 

Now this had to be the peak of guilt. He had been so selfish disappearing like that, no matter how powerless he had felt to stop himself from going. Of course they would panic if he disappeared. 

“I’m sorry,” Jonathan apologised. Barb hadn’t even occurred to him. “I didn’t think.” 

“Where are you?” She asked again. 

Jonathan paused, debating a lie and wanting to protect the fragile thing he and Billy had been developing. But Nancy wouldn’t forgive any more lies and if he couldn’t trust her, who was there? 

“I’m with Billy.” 

There was a tense moment of silence. “...what did you say?” Nancy asked faintly. 

“I got into his car he kept on driving. We... I...” He swallowed and tried again. “I wanted to be near him.” 

“You...what? Jonathan, what are you talking about? Are you and he...?” She trailed off, more shocked than angry which Jonathan was definitely willing to take advantage of as he continued to confess. 

“Yeah. Yeah but it’s complicated. I don’t know what I’m doing. I just had to go with him.” 

“Are you in love with him?” She asked carefully. 

The cord was tight enough around his fingers to be cutting off the circulation. He bounced from memory to memory of he and Billy, laughing, moaning, crying. “I thought I knew the answer to that but now I’m not so sure.” 

Another pause. 

“Are you okay?” Nancy asked him gently. “You sound upset.” 

“No. I don’t know.” He saw the man behind the desk staring at him blankly and it unsettled him. He didn’t want to be alone down here anymore. “Look, I have to go. Just tell my mom and Will I’m safe.” Or he would be once he got back upstairs. 

He had barely moved the phone from his ear before Nancy’s sharp voice thundered out of it. 

“But how can you be safe if you’re with him? At least tell me where you are,” she snapped as Jonathan attempted to say goodbye. 

He looked around frantically for something with the address on in the reception as he still had no idea where the hell he was. He snatched up a yellowing brochure dumped on the window sill. It looked seriously dated but the address stretched across the bottom half of the cover had to be correct. He rattled it off without really thinking about it and make quick goodbyes, desperate to be gone. 

Billy was lying facing the door when Jonathan slipped inside. He watched in silence as Jonathan undressed again and slid into bed with him. 

“Please.” Jonathan didn’t know exactly what he was asking for. Neither did Billy. 

“There’s nothing I can give you.” Billy tugged Jonathan closer, leaving his hand on his back. “I just keep taking.” 

Jonathan pressed a hand to Billy’s chest and felt his steady heartbeat. “There’s something about you...” 

Billy smiled in a way that didn’t meet his eyes. “That’s an easy one. It’s because I’m handsome despite my awful personality. You have no idea how many girls have told me that.” 

Jonathan blinked in surprise. “What?” 

“See, they like to look at me and hear the dirty things I whisper in their ears. They like what I can do for them but they don’t want to hear me talk. Not about stuff that bothers or interests me.” Billy shrugged. 

Cold comprehension was rising in Jonathan’s mind as was his need to hold the other boy close. “So the only way you can get people to listen is getting up in their faces so they have to notice.” 

Even in the low light he could see the blush colouring Billy’s face as he nodded. 

“I listen to you-” Jonathan began but Billy cut him off with a snort. 

“You’re afraid of me. I don’t know how many times I have to tell you this before you actually do listen to me. I’ve been awful to you. I’ve hurt you, made you cry, raped you.” He spat the last part out and sat up, drawing his knees to his chest and resting his arms on top. “We’re stuck in this hole I’ve dug and no matter what I do or you say now, it isn’t going to change all the shit I’ve done. If you can’t see that... What I’ve done to you...” 

Jonathan knelt up. “If you think you’re the worst thing that’s ever happened to me, I’m happy to tell you you’re so, so wrong. If you think I don’t know what we’ve been doing is more wrong than it’s right, you’re mistaken there too. If you think I don’t...” Jonathan had to pause and take a steadying breath. “If you think I don’t desperately want to be with you just because of all the things you’ve put me through, you’re-” 

“Wrong?” Billy guessed half-heartedly. 

“That, and a fucking idiot. Like I didn’t know from the beginning what was going through your head.” Billy met his eyes and Jonathan gave him a pitying smirk. “You’re not so mysterious even if you do scare me.” 

Billy reached out and slid a hand into Jonathan’s. “I don’t want to scare you anymore.” 

“Then stop threatening to walk away. You not speaking to me after each time was the worst thing. I need you.” 

Billy sighed and tipped his head back on to the headboard. “What are we going to do?” 

That was something Jonathan had been thinking about. “Go back to Hawkins, at least for a little while. And you’re not going anywhere near your Dad if I can help it.” 

“How do you think you’re going to manage that?” Billy gave him a look like he thought Jonathan was talking absolute garbage. 

Billy could think what he liked but Jonathan really did have a plan and it started with using his own support network. “Do you know Hopper? Well, he’s kind of a friend of my mom’s and when I tell them what your dad’s been doing, Hopper will make him back off. And my mom will have you stay with us although you’ll have to pull your weight.” 

Billy blinked at him a few times. “Why would he do that? And if your mom knew what we’ve done – what I’ve done – she'd have me shot.” 

Jonathan shrugged. “Hopper’s a champion of the downtrodden and my mom can’t stand nasty fathers. And our past is our business.” 

“This isn’t healthy.” 

“You’re right. But it’s what we’ve got.” 

\--- 

“Go away,” Jonathan laughed as Billy looped an arm around his waist and pulled him forward against his wet chest while he was trying to towel dry his hair. 

“Can’t. That’s our last towel.” He plucked it from Jonathan’s head and dropped it on the floor. 

Jonathan arched an eyebrow as he looped his arms around Billy’s neck. “You don’t seem to want it.” 

“It was hiding something better.” Billy grinned and waggled his own eyebrows, knowing damn well that line sounded like it came right out of one of those romance novels all the moms read. 

Jonathan tilted his head up to kiss Billy, so close their noses almost brushed, when the door banged open letting in the morning sun and a hell of a lot of shouting. 

“Jonathan!” 

“Get off him, Hargrove!” 

Jonathan leaped back from Billy, covering himself at the last second as he came face to face with Nancy and Steve. 

“What the fuck, Harrington?” Billy picked up the towel and passed it to Jonathan to cover himself with while he continued across the room to where his jeans lay by the bathroom door, making sure his back was turned out of sight. “What do you think you’re doing?” 

Both Nancy and Steve were beet red and had their eyes fixed on the ceiling. 

“What are we doing? What are you doing? Both of you!” Steve demanded, glaring at them both now Billy had put his jeans on. 

“Jonathan...” Nancy tried again, softer this time, and took a tentative step towards him. 

He shook his head and turned away. “Can you both get out? Please, I just need a minute.” 

“Like hell we’re leaving you here with him,” Steve snarled. 

Billy cracked his knuckles. “Got something to say?” 

“Oh plenty you-_ow!_” 

Jonathan looked up to see Steve rubbing his arm and staring accusingly at Nancy. 

“Can you both stop for one minute?” Nancy looked pointedly at Steve and Billy before turning back to Jonathan. “We’ll wait outside while you get dressed. Come on, Steve.” She dragged a protesting Steve out the door and closed it behind them. 

“Did you call her last night?” Billy asked quietly. 

Jonathan nodded and buried his face in his hands, barely registering the towel falling to the floor. “The phone was off at home and I only know one other number. She wanted to know where I was and I just gave her the address because I wanted to get back to you. I’m sorry.” 

Billy sighed and drew Jonathan against him once more. “Don’t be. It was going to happen eventually, right? And you don’t have to do what you said last night. I’ll go back to my dad and-” 

Jonathan was having none of it. He reached up to cup Billy’s face in his hands. “You’re not going near him. I mean it.” 

“But-” Billy tried to protest until Jonathan’s lips covered his. 

“I mean it,” he repeated. “There are monsters out there worse than you could ever imagine. We have to stick together.” 

Billy grinned as he ran his hands along Jonathan’s back. “You just wanna take more dirty pictures of me.” 

Jonathan snorted. “Something like that. Come on, before Steve kicks the door down.” 

\--- 

Well, Jonathan had been in some uncomfortable situations in his life but sharing a booth in that diner with Billy, Nancy and Steve and everyone refusing to speak had to be in the top three. Steve and Billy had been glaring at each other from across the table since they sat down while Nancy stirred her milkshake with a straw. Jonathan just kept looking between them all, not exactly one for breaking silences, but there was only so much he could take. 

He cleared his throat. “So...” 

Steve’s head snapped towards him and Jonathan fought not to flinch. “Have you lost your damn mind, Byers? Disappearing like that and with _him_ of all people.” He jerked his head in Billy’s direction with a look of disgust. “I thought even you had better taste than that.” 

Jonathan couldn’t help but bristle at that. “It’s complicated and none of your business.” 

“It became my business when I got dragged into the search party. Did you even think about what you’d be putting your family through when you went off with him? Tell him, Nance.” Steve nudged Nancy. 

She looked up with a nervous smile. “I know you didn’t mean to hurt anyone but we’ve all been worried, especially your mom. We’ve been looking everywhere for you, even had Eleven look too but she went bright red and wouldn’t say anything. I think I know why now.” 

Jonathan cringed at the thought of what the girl might have seen. “I didn’t mean to scare anyone but I had to go.” That was a decision he couldn’t afford to regret. “I’m sorry I didn’t call sooner but I’m not sorry I went. I’d do it again.” 

He fought not to smile too obviously as Billy took his hand under the table. 

Steve sighed and slumped back, crossing his arms. “It just doesn’t make sense. You two, of all the people in Hawkins, together? How does something like that happen?” 

Nancy nodded and reached for Jonathan’s other hand which was resting on the table. “Yeah, I mean, what do you two even have in common?” 

Though neither were holding him tightly, Jonathan felt a little like he was being pulled in two directions. The more expected, definitely safer path with Nancy or someone like her, anyway. Or the one which had made him equally miserable and complete with someone he knew he could make a difference with. 

“Enough.” He freed himself from Nancy’s grip. “Look, I’m sorry for all this and I appreciate you looking out for me and my family but this,” he gestured between himself and Billy. “Is what’s happening.” 

Steve just stared at him, open-mouthed. “After everything he’s done? I bet there’s stuff we don’t even know about. He hasn’t even said anything! Why the silence, Hargrove?” 

“I answer to Jonathan, not you.” Billy squeezed his hand and went back to staring out the window and ignoring everyone. 

Jonathan quite liked the sound of that. He tugged on Billy’s hand and made to stand. “We should get going.” 

“Where?” Steve and Nancy demanded as one, turning red when the few other customers and servers turned to look their way. 

Jonathan glanced at Billy then to the car through the window. “Home. After that, I’m not sure.” He shrugged. 

Nancy frowned and looked like she was about to reach for him again so he took a step back. “You’re not leaving Hawkins, are you?” 

Jonathan shrugged again. “Maybe. It wouldn’t be easy but I don’t know why we’ve all stayed there anyway after everything that’s happened.” The more he spoke, the more it made sense. “A fresh start sounds real good to me. Billy?” 

“Let’s go.” Billy headed for the door, ignoring Steve and Nancy’s protests as Jonathan waved goodbye and followed him to the car. 

Billy pointed to the hood. “Sit.” 

Jonathan obeyed and was pleasantly surprised when Billy slid between his knees and lifted his chin, drawing their mouths together. Jonathan hummed contentedly and hooked his thumbs through Billy’s belt loops to pull him closer. 

They broke apart and rested their foreheads together. 

“California,” Billy muttered. 

“What?” 

Billy straightened up, though he didn’t make it very far with Jonathan still holding him. “California,” he repeated. “My mom still lives there. She moved to LA a few months back. I think she might help us out if I tell her about what’s been going on with my dad. What do you say?” 

LA? From what he knew, it was like a different world to little Hawkins, so big you might never find your way out again. Didn’t that sound more appealing than frightening? The hopeful look in Billy’s eyes made Jonathan think that it might be just right. And, anyway, he was getting sick of photographing the same trees over and over again. 

“Okay.”

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you enjoyed this - comments and kudos appreciated <3 I'll see you all in 18 months for the third installment!


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